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Self-Compassion
Ages 5 to 6Personal / Compassion
Treating yourself the way you would treat a friend.
Let’s Experience It
Mila tries to write his name. The letters look wobbly. He feels upset. His teacher says, “Everyone makes mistakes when learning.” Mila takes a deep breath. He says, “I can try again.” He tries once more. This time he feels proud of trying hard.
What’s Happening?
Mila is being kind to himself. This is called self-compassion. It means treating yourself like a good friend. When we make mistakes, we do not need to feel bad. Everyone makes mistakes. That is how we learn.
Sometimes we feel frustrated. Our work does not look right. We fall down. We forget something. These things happen to everyone. We can soothe ourselves. We can say, “It is okay. I will try again.” This helps us feel better.
It is important to celebrate our efforts. Trying hard matters. Finishing is not the only goal. When we work hard, we should feel proud. Even if it is not perfect, we did our best. That is what counts.
Taking care of ourselves is part of self-compassion too. We need rest when we are tired. We need to ask for help when things are hard. We need to eat and drink water. Basic self-care helps our body and mind feel good.
Why It Matters
When we are kind to ourselves, we feel brave. We try new things. We do not give up easily. Self-compassion helps us keep learning. It makes hard things easier.
Asking for help is smart, not weak. Everyone needs help sometimes. When we take care of ourselves, we can do our best.
Try It Yourself
Kind Words for Me:
Think of something hard you tried.
Put your hand on your heart.
Say, “I tried my best.”
Say, “It is okay to make mistakes.”
Take three deep breaths.
Remember
Be kind to yourself like you are kind to a friend.
Everyone makes mistakes.
Every effort matters. Take care of yourself.
Check yourself
13 questions on this topic. Nothing is saved and nothing is
sent anywhere.
These were written for the next age band up — the curriculum has no set
of its own for this age.
You try to tie your shoes but the knot comes undone. You feel upset with yourself. What can you think?
Being kind to yourself when learning something hard is called self-compassion. Everyone makes mistakes when learning - it's how we get better! Saying kind words to yourself like 'I'm learning' helps you keep trying.
You're tired after school and need to rest. Your friend wants to play. What should you do?
Taking care of yourself when you're tired is important! This is called self-care. It's okay to tell friends you need rest. True friends understand. When you rest, you'll have more energy to play later!
You spilled juice on your drawing and now it's messy. You worked so hard on it! What helps?
When something goes wrong with something you worked hard on, it's okay to feel disappointed. AND you can remember that mistakes happen to everyone. This is self-compassion - being understanding with yourself. You can start fresh and make something new!
You can't reach a book on a high shelf. What should you do?
Asking for help when you need it is a strength, not a weakness! This is part of taking care of yourself. Everyone needs help sometimes - kids, grown-ups, even teachers. It's brave and smart to ask.
You fell down while running and your knee hurts. You also feel embarrassed. What can you tell yourself?
Being kind to yourself when you fall or make mistakes is self-compassion. Everyone falls sometimes - it doesn't mean you're bad or clumsy. Saying kind words to yourself helps you feel better and try again!
You're learning to write letters and your 'S' looks wobbly. What's a kind thing to think?
When learning something new, it's normal to not be perfect at first! Being kind to yourself means remembering that learning takes time. Every wobbly letter is practice that makes you better. Be patient with yourself!
You feel really tired after a long day but your friend wants to play. What's taking care of yourself?
Listening to your body when it's tired is self-care! It's okay to tell friends you need rest. Good friends understand. When you take care of yourself, you'll have more energy to play later. Resting is important!
In Tibet, people often take quiet time to rest their minds. Why is this good?
In Tibet and everywhere, quiet time helps our busy minds rest. Just like your body needs sleep, your mind needs peaceful moments too. This is self-care! Even a few quiet minutes can help you feel better.
You forgot your lunch at home. What can you do?
Asking for help when you need it is smart and brave! Everyone forgets things sometimes - grown-ups too! A teacher can help you. Being kind to yourself means remembering that forgetting doesn't make you bad.
You tried your best on a puzzle but couldn't finish it. How should you feel?
Trying your best is what matters most! Not finishing a puzzle doesn't mean you failed - it means it was challenging. You can feel proud of your effort and try again later. Self-compassion means being proud of trying!
You made a mistake during a game and your team lost. What's a self-compassionate thought?
Everyone makes mistakes in games - even professional players! Being self-compassionate means remembering this and being kind to yourself. You're learning and getting better. One mistake doesn't define you or ruin the game.
You feel scared to try the monkey bars because they look high. What can you tell yourself?
Feeling scared of something new or high is normal! Self-compassion means accepting your feelings without being mean to yourself. You can try when you feel ready, or ask a grown-up to help. Everyone learns at their own pace.
If your friend made the same mistake you did, what would you say to them?
We're often kinder to friends than to ourselves! If you would say kind things to a friend who made a mistake, try saying those same kind things to yourself. This is self-compassion - being your own good friend.
Self-Compassion at other ages
The same topic, written for older and younger children. Worth a look when
you are judging how far to take it.