Self-Compassion

Ages 5 to 6 Personal / Compassion

Treating yourself the way you would treat a friend.

Let’s Experience It

Mila tries to write his name. The letters look wobbly. He feels upset. His teacher says, “Everyone makes mistakes when learning.” Mila takes a deep breath. He says, “I can try again.” He tries once more. This time he feels proud of trying hard.

What’s Happening?

Mila is being kind to himself. This is called self-compassion. It means treating yourself like a good friend. When we make mistakes, we do not need to feel bad. Everyone makes mistakes. That is how we learn.

Sometimes we feel frustrated. Our work does not look right. We fall down. We forget something. These things happen to everyone. We can soothe ourselves. We can say, “It is okay. I will try again.” This helps us feel better.

It is important to celebrate our efforts. Trying hard matters. Finishing is not the only goal. When we work hard, we should feel proud. Even if it is not perfect, we did our best. That is what counts.

Taking care of ourselves is part of self-compassion too. We need rest when we are tired. We need to ask for help when things are hard. We need to eat and drink water. Basic self-care helps our body and mind feel good.

Why It Matters

When we are kind to ourselves, we feel brave. We try new things. We do not give up easily. Self-compassion helps us keep learning. It makes hard things easier.

Asking for help is smart, not weak. Everyone needs help sometimes. When we take care of ourselves, we can do our best.

Try It Yourself

Kind Words for Me:

  1. Think of something hard you tried.
  2. Put your hand on your heart.
  3. Say, “I tried my best.”
  4. Say, “It is okay to make mistakes.”
  5. Take three deep breaths.

Remember

Check yourself

13 questions on this topic. Nothing is saved and nothing is sent anywhere.

These were written for the next age band up — the curriculum has no set of its own for this age.

  1. You try to tie your shoes but the knot comes undone. You feel upset with yourself. What can you think?

  2. You're tired after school and need to rest. Your friend wants to play. What should you do?

  3. You spilled juice on your drawing and now it's messy. You worked so hard on it! What helps?

  4. You can't reach a book on a high shelf. What should you do?

  5. You fell down while running and your knee hurts. You also feel embarrassed. What can you tell yourself?

  6. You're learning to write letters and your 'S' looks wobbly. What's a kind thing to think?

  7. You feel really tired after a long day but your friend wants to play. What's taking care of yourself?

  8. In Tibet, people often take quiet time to rest their minds. Why is this good?

  9. You forgot your lunch at home. What can you do?

  10. You tried your best on a puzzle but couldn't finish it. How should you feel?

  11. You made a mistake during a game and your team lost. What's a self-compassionate thought?

  12. You feel scared to try the monkey bars because they look high. What can you tell yourself?

  13. If your friend made the same mistake you did, what would you say to them?

Self-Compassion at other ages

The same topic, written for older and younger children. Worth a look when you are judging how far to take it.